Our biggest fear, not making it home safely!
Our greatest regret, trusting you!
Our strongest hatred, loving you!
Our biggest mistakes, falling in love with your euphemised lies!
Our purity, stolen by you
Our innocence, ripped from our hands!
Our body’s, beaten and bruised!
Our hearts, broken and crushed!
Our cookie jars, forcefully emptied!
Now tell me, are we safe?
‘Get a protection order’, they say
‘Take boxing classes’, they say
‘Watch how you dress’, they say
‘Don’t walk far ‘, they say
‘Hang around the right people’ they say
And yet each, ‘they say’ led to one more statistic
Each stereotypical “they say” led to two more statistic
Each ignored statistic led to more statistics!
Now tell me are we safe?
It’s hard to see u as someone I used to know
It’s hard to think of you as someone worth my forgiveness
I’m stuck in a cycle of vicious memories I shouldn’t have
I’m rolling around in a circle of regret and bitterness
I’m playing on a playground of resentment and hurt
What did I ever do wrong?
Your nails, how they dug into my skin when all I wanted was to be caressed
Your hand, how it merged with my face when all I wanted was to rest
Your teeth, how they left rabbis marks when their job is to chew.
Your belt, how it left swollen tattoos on my skin, when its job is to hold your trousers.
Your junior, how it constantly injured me when its job is to satisfy.
Your body, how it compressed me when its job is protect me.
Now tell me, are we safe?
You pretended like you loved me in kisses
When my skin remembers bruises!
You acted like I was your precious pet
When all you did was treat me like a dog!
You love to call me pretty
When I learnt to see ugly in the mirror from your words!
You deceived with lies
When all I wanted was your heart!
You played me like a toy
When all I wanted was to be you one and only!
You loved me in intimacy
When all you wanted was to puppet me!
Now tell me, am I safe?
You make me fell crazy for remembering your fist
Ironically, that’s the only thing that seemed to turn you on
You fill me with compliments
Ironically, you’ve stuffed me with insults
You act like you’re strong and manly
Ironically, only weak men force
You act like you’re sincere
Ironically, you knew your actions were pretend
You acted like you loved me in sight
Ironically Cupid was blind
Now tell me, are we safe?
Red, swollen, enlarged
Pain, devastation, betrayal
Regret, hatred, disappointment
The bruises don’t hurt anymore
My body is numb, numb to your pain,
Renewed wounds and relived scars.
It has become a norm in society.
My palace of respect is now a vessel of insecurities.
Ignorant, naïve, carless1
Pull down the stereotypes!
Take down the lies!
Stand up for us!
Now tell me, why won’t you make us safe?
Gently, he would stare into my eyes with endless admiration
Lightly, he would caress my skin with soul swelling adoration
Delicately, he took my purity with promised good intention
Mildly, he became hollower and spoke words with less conviction
Rarely, he treated me with love respect or compassion
Harshly he handles me with no regard or conscience
Roughly he inflicts pain and sadness without hesitation
Now tell me, are we safe?
I tried convincing myself that this is love
Always counting the ways I let u down
But truth is I let myself down
I should have known something so painful wasn’t love
That something so forced wasn’t love!
That something so painful wasn’t love!
That clearly I was a victim of manipulation.
Now tell me, are we safe?
Now tell me, are we safe?
She is now mute
Her tears have run dry
Her sobs have silenced
Her lips no longer utter
Her skin no longer flawless
Her face no longer attractive
Now tell me, are we safe?
~Lindokuhle
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